The man I wish I had
by NCISforever
Summary: Gibbs and Ziva are secretly having feelings for each other,but neither knows they are returned. I'm not a native speaker don't be mad if there are some mistakes. This is my first FanFic please review.
1. Chapter 1

_**The man I wish I had**_

**EPILOGUE**

_~ZIVAS POV~_

I am in my apartment, sitting alone on my couch, reading a book drinking wine. I did that often lately; it distracts me from the thoughts in my brain. Thoughts I am not supposed to have. They are about feelings, feelings I am not supposed to have either. I realized some time ago, that there is no way to hide from your feelings. Right now I wish I could. I know this is wrong; I should not have feelings for him for more than one reason. First he is my boss; second is way older than me and third rule number twelve. I also know that he could never have the same feelings for me as I have for him; I am not a red haired after all. So I drown my sorrow in the wine and distract myself with reading. I usually read until I fall asleep, otherwise I wouldn't be able to sleep because the thoughts about him would be coming back every time I stopped reading. Sometimes I thought I saw something in his eyes that made me think he had feelings for me, but I never allowed myself to believe in it. The chance to be disappointed was too high. I keep flirting with Tony at work, so no one would realize that I have feelings for him, especially Gibbs himself. Gibbs. The boss. The man I love. 

_~GIBBS POV~_

I am standing in my basement, sanding my boat. It calms me, gives me time to think. I still have no name for the boat; no name seems good enough for it. None of the names have a connection to the boat. I often named my boats after persons I thought about while building it, but the only one I could think of is her, and I am not about to name my boat after my coworker, my door has no lock, the team can visit every time, what if one of them sees it? What if she sees it? Until now I couldn't name it. Not after her and no other name is worth of this boat. Why it had to be her name, why I had to think about her most of the time I was building the boat, I am not sure. The last time I was this obsessed with a woman was with Shannon, but it cannot be, she is my coworker after all, I have a rule against this. Sometimes I think that she has feelings for me, those moments when her look lasts just a little too long, but then I remember how she always seems to flirt with DiNozzo and how she could have everybody she wants. Why should she want to be with an old man like me, if she can have any other man? But still I want her, no need her, but I know that that will never happen, hell it can't ever happen.


	2. Chapter 2

The team was doing paperwork, well, they were supposed to do paperwork, the only one who was actually doing paperwork, was McGee. Tony was playing a

video game, Gibbs was out getting coffee and Ziva was daydreaming about Gibbs, not that she would admit that to anyone. They had just finished a case so

they were looking forwards to a nice, quiet weekend, since they were not on call. Tony had been bragging about his hot date the whole day. McGee would

most likely play one of his computer games and Ziva; she had no idea what she would do since lately all she could do was thinking about her boss and the

things he could do to her. Gibbs would work on his boat again, trying to figure out a name for it, that was not Ziva.

McGee left the office once he had finished his paperwork, Tony left shortly afterwards even though he hadn't finished his paperwork. Ziva stayed, trying to

finally do her paperwork. Five minutes later Gibbs came in. He saw Ziva working on her paperwork and noticed the two empty seats.

"Where are Tony and McGee?" he asked.

"McGee left after he was finished his paperwork, Tony left right after him." answered Ziva.

"Without finishing his paperwork?"

"I think so. Don't worry I can finish it if you need it that badly. Let him enjoy the weekend with his newest girlfriend."

"Nah, not your job to do his work. DiNozzo will wish he had done it on Monday. Just finish yours and you can go home." He sat down and started doing his own

paperwork.

It was 9 o'clock when Gibbs had his paperwork finished and saw that Ziva still wasn't finished.

"You can go home now, enjoy your weekend; Tony will do the rest of the paperwork on Monday."

"Thank you Gibbs" said Ziva and started to pack her stuff.

They went to the elevator together. When they were in the parking lot they both went to their own cars. Gibbs was about to start his car when he noticed,

that Ziva seemed to have some trouble. She was standing next to her car looking down. He got out of his car and walked over to her.

"Having car trouble?"

"Yes, I seem to have two flats. There's no way that I will get this fixed now."

"I can give you a lift, we'll figure out how to fix your car on Monday."

"No, I don't want to bother you, I can walk."

"It won't bother me to drive you home; there is no way, that I will let you walk all the way home in the dark. Now come, get in my car."

"Fine." She said and got into the car.

"I'm sorry to make you drive all the way to my apartment; it's not on your way at all."

"No problem. I really don't mind."

It was a quiet drive, both of them deep in their thoughts about the other. When they arrived at Zivas apartment, she couldn't help but say: "Since you drove

me here will you at least come in I will cook us some dinner. I also have coffee."

"Fine." He secretly wanted to see her new apartment for a while and he knew she was a good cook. It would be nice to eat something else than take out.


End file.
